Everyone knows the old adage – to keep the peace, one must not speak of religion or politics. Most people agree that money is another taboo subject that could be added to that list. But what happens when a friend owes us a lot of money – with no payback in sight?

1. If your finances are suffering because you expected that money back, honest and open communication needs to occur. Your friend may not realize how badly you need the money, and they may not feel an urgency to repay it. Pray for wisdom in your words and softness of heart so your conversation may be fruitful.
2. Decide what is more important – the friendship or the repayment. If the friendship is more important, pray for the grace to forgive the debt and move on.
3. Accept that this may be a hard lesson learned about lending money to friends. As it tells us in Romans 13:8: “Let no debt remain outstanding, except the continuing debt to love one another, for whoever loves others has fulfilled the law.” In this verse, we are taught not only to refrain from being in debt to others, but not to let another’s debt hinder our love of them.

Many people have a hard rule against lending money to friends and family. If you do decide to help someone in the future, approach it as a gift and be delighted upon repayment.